Humor

Ungrateful

I am freaking out right now because I’m about to go on an amazing vacation. All I can think about are all of the things that could go wrong.  Is my suitcase too big to be a carry-on? Did I forget to pack something? What if we miss our flight? What if someone breaks into our house while we are gone? What if the basement floods? What if one of the cats get sick and we aren’t there? 


It’s funny. I can never think of blog topics but I’m so creative when it comes to things that could possibly hurt me. We aren’t even leaving until Thursday morning but I’ve already packed the clothing part of my bag. I think I did a good job but I made little use off all the pockets and compartments that compelled me to buy the suitcase in the first place. They’ll probably just end up be a hassle with the TSA. I hope they don’t dig in my suitcase. I couldn’t possibly look less like a member of isis. 


But then again, what if that’s why they target me? What if it turns out that someone did sneak contraband into my luggage when I wasn’t looking and then I have to spend the rest of my life in jail?


Seriously though, if they fuck up my suitcase it is going to be a mother-fucker fitting everything into it again. It would be a nightmare to have to roll all that shit back up while sitting in the waiting area inside an airport. 

I’m a bit of an over-packer. That should come as no surprise. I managed to fit two pairs of jeans, five t-shirts, two tank tops, a swim suit, three dresses and five sweaters into a carry-on bag. I also packed four pairs of shoes and seven pair of underwear and socks. Oh my God! And, like, five bras. I’m actually pretty proud of myself. And I created a travel outfit comprised of my bulkier clothing. Oh yeah, I also packed three pairs of shorts. I hope it fits in the overhead bin.


Tomorrow I have to do an even greater trick. I have to fit all of my makeup into my purse along with all my devices and chargers and I have to figure out how to shove all my medication and travel sized liquids into a quart sized bag. So that sounds fun. I should download some Netflix shows to watch on the plane. I should remember snacks. I know I’m forgetting things. 

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