Humor

Traffic Rant

I just want to take a minute to say a big “fuck you” to all the arrogant, self-important pieces of shit who think that they need to speed down a lane that we all know is ending, so that they can cut off as many people as possible. I want them to understand that they are the reason why we are all stuck in traffic in the first place. If they would have simply merged with traffic when they first entered the highway like they were supposed to, when the cars were still moving, then we wouldn’t even have any traffic to be sitting in right now and I might have made it home without having this time to reflect.  


So thank  you for being a selfish asshole who doesn’t know how to drive. Thank you for letting me know you’re someone whose time is more important than my time and that wherever you’re going is more important then wherever I’m going. You’re probably right. Thank you for the chance to humbled before you on this interstate where we are now at a dead stop because all of us had to stop to let all of you in front of us. 


I suppose I should be penalized because I’m on your road with you at the same time that you wanted to drive on it. I’m clearly in your way. I apologize. This is obviously very hard for you to deal with since you don’t know how to drive. So thank you for allowing me to get behind you in line. You are beyond gracious. I am beyond grateful. 

What pisses you guys off in traffic? I hope it’s not people writing blogs at stop lights. 

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5 thoughts on “Traffic Rant”

      1. Ugh I know. Road construction sucks balls. For almost the entire time my son was in elementary, there was a crapton of construction going on down the main road through town.It took the better part of FOUR FUCKING YEARS to widen the main road from 2 lanes to 6 because TXDOT sucks. And then when they were adding turn lanes and crap to the section of road right before you turn left to turn onto the road where my son’s jr high is? They had TRAFFIC CONES. And it was confusing as heck. If you didn’t go down that way multiple times a day (as I used to do before he started riding the bus), you were screwed. I hate construction with a passion.

        People go “How the hell can you have driving anxiety?” and all I have to point out is that people in Texas drive like their asses are on fire and they’ve lost about half their brain cells.

        Like

  1. When people squeeze into one lane, bringing traffic to a stand-still, instead of using both lanes at a slow speed, and then merging a reasonable distance from the end of the lane. (wink)

    Liked by 1 person

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